My Bedroom & I

When I think about a “safe” place I think of my childhood bedroom. A room with a mind, holding memories that have faded from me. Each layer of paint represents a phase of my life. If that room could talk I wonder what it would say about me.

Summer was coming to an end. The sun brightened the sky for hours past dinner, tempting all the neighborhood kids to continue to play. The different colored beams peered through the cracks of my glass shuttered window, in my tiny half bathroom. My mirror closet shared the light to my entire room, creating a perfect mist above my bed. I lay there on my back moving my legs back and forth on my cold sheets. I was surrounded by my light teal walls, tan wood furniture and the smell of freshly washed blankets being swiftly carried by my ceiling fan. I knew my mom was going to interrupt my serene scene to question why I was laying down early for the first day of school. As soon as I got the signal from the squeaky floor boards in the hallway an uncontrollable grin crept over my face. I quickly pull my armor of covers up to my nose and close my eyes. I can hear the door knob twist. I picture her opening it just enough to slide her face in, in between the door and wall. The floor board squeaks, my eyes pop back open and me and my room continue.

I get to visit it from time to time, the walls are masked by a new paint coat chosen by my mom but I still see its true character.



A Calling

Uncertainty lingered in the shadows

it whispered, take a closer look

underneath my painted picture

was a twisted, tainted, unread book

Curiosity nudged me nearer

it murmured read each & every line

unleashed within these pages

was a torturous truth that wasn’t mine

Anger ignited a trail of fire

it steered me straight to you

unraveled at your core

was a sadistic story overdue

Numbness cloaked my body

it made not a single sound

unfazed by the tears you wept

was a women that stood her ground



I wear thoughts of you as a helmet each day 

like a shadow that never strays

A weight is taunting me 

to bathe in memories & what could be

Like a whisper crawling up my skin

Persuading me to fall again

A heavy wind that comes & goes

I push back until the next blow


Hand in hand the river ran smooth

Your own brother told on you

deny deny deny

You promised to put your mask aside

Your apologies so sweet so sincere

I turned the corner & you reappeared

Soft hair soft eyes

Should have known your disguise

Hand in hand the river ran smooth

I decided to forgive you

deny deny deny

I took your mask & gave it a try

repeating over & over in my head

Did I need you near or need you dead

I fooled me, I fooled you

This was meant to come unglued



The nest where I lay my head with you

Each branch picked by me or you

Perfectly woven choices holding us close

Our nest was lit up by the moon

Our branches turned into a web made by only you

I fell through

The nest where I lay my head is true

Each branch picked in spite of you

Perfectly woven choices holding me

My nest was lit up by the moon

My branches will not change for you

You can’t break through




I had an unplanned adventurous day walking through knee deep water for 2 miles in a cave. I love days like today! My best friend took me to her families reunion at a farm. It was my dream house surrounded by a ton of beautiful flowers, vines, and trees. A curvy mysterious path led us to a secret opening to the cave. We laughed, drank wine, had margaritas, and had funny conversations. I also met new people. Life always feels beautiful on days like today.


I am writing this from my desk at work with one eye open today 😴 . Last night at 11:10pm my brother had his first baby (Penelope) with his wife Meredith. I am so excited to see our family grow. It’s always so surreal living in a moment that you know will pass by so quickly. A memory I’ll always remember. I can’t wait to get to know Penelope!